Do you think your partner feels superior to others? Do they have an entitled approach to events? Have you ever felt that your partner might not be empathetic towards anyone? Want to learn about how to stop being a narcissist?
Then this article is for you as I discuss the 21 stages of a narcissistic relationship. This will give you a better idea of how to deal with several daily concerns you face in your relationship and cannot come out of it!
You probably are if you constantly feel that your partner is manipulating you. Instincts are always right, you know! Are you dating a narcissist?
In this blog, I will share certain instances in my past relationship with you. It might help you identify the behavior or patterns of your partner, which will help you determine if you are in a narcissistic relationship.
Who Is A Narcissist?
A narcissist is someone who is quite important to themselves and holds themselves in high esteem. Others must have them in high regard and get inspired by them.
Even on social media, you will constantly find them posting pictures of themselves more than anything else! Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is something that expresses an idea of power, brilliance, and beauty, thus idolizing these aspects.
Self-importance is also an important part of their personality! They also believe in themselves to a maniacal level. Hence, self-righteousness is a part of their characterization. Sometimes, narcissism creates resentment in relationships!
Your Partner Has No Sense Of Empathy So, Learn 21 stages of a narcissistic relationship!
There are several aspects of a narcissist as NPD is a severity of the mental health conditions! What do you want to know about narcissism? Have you been in a relationship with a narcissist? Want to know what are the stages through which you go when you date a narcissist?
Challenges and aggression are part of a relationship where mental and physical health conditions contribute to the way a narcissist is in a relationship. Determine the way a narcissist deals with their victim and how it is often a significant part of the special treatment they cater to!
In most cases, self-esteem and inadequacy are a part of their character when uniqueness and special aspects of a person are impacted negatively by a narcissist. They try to take the limelight and work better with more attention.
It is also important to understand that if you are a victim here, you must address several aspects that make them a part of the damage. Haughtiness and arrogance are what they use to manipulate interpersonal relationships. Read about the 21 stages of a narcissistic relationship!
Attraction
A narcissist loves attention, so their first step is to attract their victim by creating an environment where they show they want acceptance and love! In the beginning days of the relationship, a narcissist attracts the victim with flattering comments, expensive gifts, and romantic messages!
This is their way of winning affection in the relationship, thus leading to the victim thinking that they are important to the narcissist. It is the first stage of 21 stages of a narcissistic relationship!
Illusion
This is where the founding stones of manipulation are laid down, so basically, a narcissist will be paying very close attention to the victim. The victim might feel that the narcissist is trying to learn about their desires and needs because they love them.
The impression that your narcissist partner will give you is that they are your perfect soul mate after learning everything from you and, accordingly, sharing common interests and choices. This is where the narcissist shows that they have the same preferences as the victim.
Why are we calling this stage an illusion? It is due to the fact that narcissists are identities who are completely incapable of loving others. They only want people who will make them feel special and idealize them; hence, they develop an understanding of the victim to manipulate them!
Devaluation
This is the state where the manipulation starts with value! The narcissist gives validation to the victim in limits as it is a part of their abuse. However, devaluing the victim is a major part of this stage.
After going through red flags in a relationship, you can develop an understanding into a toxic relationship! The narcissist has completely enraptured the victim by then!
Now, they are working on damaging the self-esteem of the victim and controlling them. There is, ofcourse, a sense of subtlety in the way they devalue the victim, thus creating a toxic attachment.
Trauma Bonding
This is the stage where the victim starts to bond with their narcissistic partner because they are regularly getting hurt in the relationship. In the process of a relationship, the narcissist partner keeps breaking their victim along with approving and verifying them but in a fake way or falsely.
Throughout this process, the victim feels that they will relax or feel better only with the help of the narcissist! What they are unable to process is that it is the narcissist who is hurting them in the first place.
Control
From the beginning of the relationship, the victim, after getting attracted to the narcissist, becomes completely addicted to the manipulation. The influence becomes so strong that the victim might become completely isolated from others in their lives once the narcissist has taken control.
If you are the victim in this relationship, you will wait for their permission or perspective on events in your life. After a certain time, you will feel that your narcissistic partner is your caretaker. A pseudo-love that is already integrated into the victim in the devaluation stage!
Never Satisfied
The narcissist is never satisfied, and by this stage, the victim is already involved deeply in the relationship. They try their best to make the narcissist partner happy and comfortable; however, there is nothing that the victim can do to make them happy.
In a relationship, the narcissist partner keeps claiming that they need love and support from the victim; however, the truth is that they need someone to control. For them, the world is responsible for everything that goes wrong while they are the perfect idealist.
The narcissist acquires satisfaction from egoistic desire and gains a sense of pleasure from controlling their victim. They believe in their ways and try to manipulate their victim to believe in them, too.
Defeat And Denial
Hopelessness rides high on the victim in this stage of the relationship as the narcissistic partner tries their best to prove to the victim that they are a failure. Even though it is a difficult position to be in, the victim is unable to walk away from the relationship.
They keep feeling hopeless and cannot accept the situation’s reality. The victim easily agrees with the false promises given by the narcissist as these promises make them wanna hold on to the relationship.
Trapped
This is the stage where the victim feels completely trapped in the relationship and does not find any point in it all! There is no hope for them, and it is only a matter of time before they start thinking about alternatives.
At times, the narcissist will be approving some of your actions to maintain the push-and-pull relationship. You will realize that you will do little things to feel they support you! This will keep you in an anxiety-ridden state as you will feel both aspects of attachment and distress.
Resistance
In this stage, the power and the control that the narcissist has on the victim crumbles as the victim takes a firm stand. They speak up about what is not okay. However, the narcissist partner does not accept any responsibility, nor do they validate the experience of the victim of their confrontation!
Gaslighting
The narcissist tries to project their flaws on the victim as the victim tries to express themselves. The attempt to gaslight the victim is in this stage as the experiences of the victim are invalidated and minimized in this stage.
Blame-Shifting
It is one of the easiest ways for a narcissist to do is to blame others for any inconvenience you face! So basically, if you are in a relationship with a narcissist, you will experience blame regularly. They will keep gaslighting you and invalidating you.
A narcissist never takes the responsibility that lies with them! Therefore, for a victim in this stage to receive regular blame and then see the narcissist taking on the blame to hold on to them or maintain control is quite common.
Self-Blame
The following stage is where victims experience psychological abuse as they keep experiencing hurt and blaming themselves. Narcissists create practices to manipulate the victim. The alternative blame shifting in the relationship is a common part of narcissism!
Confusion
Confusion is a stage where there are several characteristics of loss and helplessness. The victim in this stage tries to improve themselves along with trying to give in to the narcissist’s demands. This does not work, especially in the face of denial for the narcissist!
The development in a relationship leads to significant confusion between how the victim is treated and how they respond! The rationality of the situation starts dawning on the victim and accordingly being treated.
Survival Mode
There can be several reasons Why you feel anxious in a relationship. You need to evaluate the reason behind it! If you are someone who is in a relationship with a narcissist, you might feel like you are on eggshells at this stage.
Your survival mode is on because you do not want to upset the narcissist! The self-worth of a narcissist is dependent on how you are treating them.
Hence, if you undermine them, it will lead to silent treatment, ridicule, and rage. This will further impact your overall personality in the relationship! A significant part of the 21 stages of a narcissistic relationship helps them develop an understanding.
Coming Out Of Denial
This is the stage where, as a victim, you finally realize the reality of the situation and decide to do something about it! You may leave and come out of the relationship; however, there is still a long way to go!
After you hit the rock bottom, denial is the most common approach. You have to come out of the denial by highlighting to yourself that the relationship is not real.
Acknowledgment Of Abuse
You, as a victim, start reflecting on all past experiences, thus recognizing the patterns of abuse and advantages being taken. It is quite a way where you acknowledge that you have been abused.
The victim might feel confusion and apprehension; however, you identify and acknowledge the signs of abuse instead of being blinded by the pretension of affection and love. Abuse is a part of the 21 stages of a narcissistic relationship!
Taking The Power Back
Righteous anger is filled inside the victim in this stage as they finally decide to stand up and speak up for themselves. They also focus on defending themselves at this stage.
The victim finally realizes the power is in their hand as they stand. Success, beauty, and power are in their hands, while the narcissist is just trying to wield control over their victims.
Discard
The time is here when any of the partners will leave the other! It can either be the narcissist who has realized that their game is up and discards the victim in the face of threat from the victim. Or it is the victim who gathers the courage to walk away from the narcissist!
Healing
A journey of healing starts at this stage because the victim recovers! Validation and emotions are a part of this stage as the victim learns to put themselves first. They prioritize their desires and needs and accept all their faults and growth.
Hoovering
This is the stage when a narcissist might try to reach out to you and try to suck you back into the relationship. This is toxic behavior, and you might not have any warning where they can threaten themselves of committing suicide or harming themselves.
Moving On
You can finally move on from being victims as they learn to put themselves first! Even though you have learned the hard way, you must keep the lesson with you, especially all the validation and love.
Finishing Off…
To sum up, the 21 stages of a narcissistic relationship are quite important to know to learn how to deal with another person. It is important to consider how to deal with the narcissistic partner along with valuing yourself.
Are you wondering about the part where you seek validation from your narcissist partner? Forget it and focus on yourself. Prioritize yourself! You have to learn about the parts of life that are perfect because of you, not because of the narcissist!
Comment on what is important for you, especially when it comes to your self-worth, growth, and development or trying to satisfy a narcissistic partner.
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